“tidy the f*ck up” by messie condo

It’s been almost ten years since Marie Kondo both baffled and inspired me, but during that time I’m sure I’ve accumulated way more stuff than I’ve tossed. And I’ve never tidied a room, or even a closet, by removing everything from it and putting it all in one big pile to sort through. I’ve never been tempted to empty my purse nightly, or to thank my old belongings for their years of service before dropping them off at Goodwill. 

I have, however, retained the desire to pare down and tidy up. So obviously when I first saw this *new tidying book (*from 2019), I was tempted to give it a try. On closer inspection, I saw that it is marketed as a parody (which I could have guessed from the author's name if nothing else) so I initially gave it a pass. I don't have anything against a little humor, but I assumed this book would be heavy on the laughs and light on the actual helpful tidying ideas. 

But I kept seeing this book, and eventually I gave in and bought it. I think that's mainly because there is a sequel related to "decluttering before you die"--I think I've already mentioned that's a life goal of mine--but I figured I should start at the beginning. 

This is a quick, fun read, to the extent that I realized I was enjoying my way through it so fast that I wasn't really retaining anything, so I slowed down and started taking notes. And now you will be the beneficiary of said notes. This, in brief, is "the american art of organizing your sh*t":

1. Get rid of sh*t that doesn't make you happy (and anything that is useless). Do you like it? Do you use it? Do you need it--REALLY need it? Does it fit into the life you want? If the answer to these questions is no, especially if it is something you could replace cheaply and easily, LET IT GO. That includes the "shoulds" (I should keep this because . . . ) Start with the easy stuff--leave sentimental items for later, when you've gotten good at tossing things. Finish this step before moving on to Step 2! (Note: I can not get on board with the Step 1 advice about books to only keep a "desert island" selection. I LOVE having shelves and shelves full of books in my house. Besides, the author also says "let your home reflect who you are" and I'm nothing if not a reader and book-hoarder lover.) Obviously most of the work is in Step 1. 

2. Find a place for what's left. Store things where it makes sense! Keep it simple, and avoid stacking things: if you can't see it, you won't use it. Step 2 is the fun part (at least it is if you like to organize). 

3. Stop buying sh*t you don't need. This step is more of a mindset-change than a task, but that doesn't mean it won't be difficult. 

Some extra tips to remember: 

Don't expect instant gratification, but stop to appreciate the small victories. Don't aim for perfection, aim for happy. But to reach happy, you need to do some thinking. What makes you happy? Start thinking about how the things in your house make you feel, rather than focusing on how they look. Prioritize what's important to you. If you don't know what you want and why you want it, browse Pinterest or home decor magazines to try to figure out what you want from your space. The whole process will take work, and part of that work is getting past the laziness. You're never going to FEEL like doing it, so you need to just push through and DO it, knowing the result will be worth the effort. Because remember: mimosas are for winners!